June 30th 2023
Non-binary.
my parents wouldn't hate me if I told them I felt non binary. I think at worst my dad would text his girlfriend that I was going through a phase. The way he would text her that I was such a bitch like my mother, without realizing his texts went straight to his computer which I was answering emails on.
My mother is ... yoni eggs, alt right almond mom, and white. She still thinks that 'trans people' just want to be woman, because they don't realize how hard it is to 'actually' BE a woman. We don't agree on much, so maybe she has changed since this.
My younger sibling enjoys a brave and attractive androgyny. My mother made them promise they would never "be trans."
As if having short hair was a "gateway drug" to "being trans," and there wasn't a whole spectrum of gender identities to express.
This idea of tans women not being women enough, is the box that TERF (trans exclusive radical feminists) are making, not realizing they trap themselves inside a box too by trying to define what is an isn't a woman.
If a woman wasn't a trans woman, then I don't know what a woman is. If a woman is exclusive, then I don't want to be woman.
There are other reasons too.
An ever changing dysmorphic relationship with my body and my self. A retreat from the conventional terms of heteronormativity, and a great fear of this possible future. Finally, a privileged position to think and explore my gender identity.